1 Merdeka

SEPT 2 — This week was an anniversary week, a week of remembrances and of forgetting. It was a rainy week, one in which Malaysians should have been proudly united in their Malaysianess, but, instead, sidestepped back into divisiveness and racial disharmony.

It was a week, when Malaysians recalled, with heartfelt pride, the hour when Malaysia’s first Prime Minister, Tunku Abul Rahman shouted, in sheer joy — Merdeka, Merdeka, Merdeka, Merdeka, Merdeka, Merdeka, Merdeka after the country finally gaining its independence from British colonial rule.

This anniversary was to be a proud day, a day when, this week, the nation celebrated 52 years of ‘freedom’ from those dastardly British, yet seemingly are unperturbed by the increasing, covert colonisation by American popular culture .

It was a bizarre week, a pythonesque week. It was a week, when the ghosts of the Monty Python team seemed to linger heavy footed, performing ghostly dances and funny walks in the air. In addition, if you listened attentively, you could practically discern John Cleese emoting — well, what have the British ever done for us, with the identical reply the People’s Front of Judea gave in the film “The Life of Brian”.

It was a superbly ironic week. A week in which the majority of Malaysia was celebrating having finally got rid of its British colonisers, and Malacca, daring to be different, was busy celebrating 500 years since the arrival, not departure, of the Portuguese.

The celebration was, apparently, to rejoice in the Portuguese heritage still evident in Malaysia — should you care to seek it. Moreover, elsewhere in the country, street names may have been changed to mask the reality of a colonial past, and building’s names altered, but Malacca continued, and continues to demonstrate a pride in its unique living heritage, and its lingering Portuguese genes.

Very much in the spirit of not defining Malaysians by what they are not, i.e. ruled by colonisers, the controversial current Prime Minister has fostered the grand concept of 1 Malaysia, no doubt appearing to seek to unite all Malaysians in their oneness. Some sceptical people say that he does this with his fingers crossed firmly behind his back.

Yet, in this anniversary week, and reader, what a week it has been, it has been well and truly demonstrated, in our wonderful country, that not everyone in Malaysia is on the same page, singing from the same hymn sheet or indeed speaking with one voice.

This week, the powers that be at Pos Malaysia issued its 1 Malaysia stamps, and, it has to be said, some of the most banal philatelic designs ever. The half-heartedness of the designs — idiotically grinning egg people in a mock rendering of the Japanese special folder IYC Year of the Child (1976) stamps, only add to the general impression of fiddling while Rome/KL burns.

It is sad, is it not, that when Malaysia has so many impressive artists and designers, who are constantly producing innovative and meaningful art works – grinning egg people is all Pos Malaysia can come up with to celebrate their P.M’s notion of 1 Malaysia, but there again, maybe that is appropriate.

While Pos Malaysia produced egg people, others went out of their way to demonstrate just how disparate Malaysia really is, despite the P.M. calling for racial unity. They, perhaps inadvertently, revealed the egg people to be Humpty Dumpty, with a dangerously thin shell and a very high wall.

The grossly misnamed Ministry of Information, Communication and Culture, which evidently uses Orwell’s 1984 as its departmental manual, had decided that 1 Malaysia should be re-written as 2 Malaysia, that is — Muslims and everybody else.

Working hard to this end the M of ICC had, in their infinite wisdom, banned all Muslims in Malaysia from attending the Black-eyed Peas concert, due to be held in Sunway Lagoon, in September - clearly demonstrating the will to perpetuate a continuing religious divide — a US (Muslims) and THEM (everyone else) attitude, amidst their very antiquated, religious apartheid, woolly thinking.

It is, however, quite ironic that the reason given for stopping adult Muslims enjoying this concert is that Guinness (the infamous Black and White) backs it, which, the M of ICC say, is evidently not good for you.

In retaliation the website for Guinness’s ‘Arthur’s Day’ celebrations, on its initial page, asks “Are you a non-Muslim aged 18 years and above” before you can proceed into the site itself.

(In a recent climb down and an update, restrictions seemingly have been lifted, last minute, from the Black-eyed Peas concert and now all adults, regardless of their religious affiliations (over 18) may attend.) One therefore wonders if this is a triumph of good sense over bigotry, or commercial pressure and the ever-present power of the dollar.

Yet I still remain bemused, because as many as four adverts, for all kinds of alcoholic beverages are permitted to be shown before the main film, in cinemas across our beloved country, even when films are specifically targeted at the country’s young.

But then, I suppose, showing grinning faces of people in the midst of alcohol consumption to children, and telling them that alcohol is good, fun, stylish, is ok, but Guinness sponsoring a concert where no alcohol will be served is not — how odd.

As Bart might say — “Don’t have a cow, man”.

Yet, to further illustrate that some small bigoted groups still exist in this multicultural nation of ours, and to demonstrate a continuing religious divide, emphasising this nation’s disparateness and gross intolerance, some 50 bull-headed residents of section 23 Shah Alam, demonstrated against a new Hindu temple being built in their area, by dragging a bloody cow’s head through the streets. Long live tolerance and togetherness.

It seems that not only is two Malaysia being promoted over one Malaysia, but the two in question is two fingers held aloft in the legendary English bowmen’s salute to the defeated French, and the one Malaysia is in fact one middle digit raised from a fist, knuckles outward.


THIS IS THE FINAL ARTICLE FOR THE MALAYSIAN INSIDER,
(please address all queries regarding the cessation of this column to The Malaysian Insider)

No Country for Old (Chinese) Men

Shakespeare said - “all the world’s a stage and all the men and women, merely players”.

Like some young dashing hero from a Hong Kong/Singapore action flick, Ring of Fury, or Once Upon a Time in Singapore perhaps, Lee Kuan Yew bravely took front stage in the drama production of Singapore and guided that country through its surprising break from Malaysia, in 1965, to produce a hit. Like a Hero he made a Promise and marshalled that newly nascent country beyond Orwell’s 1984 into a Brave New World, with sincerest apologies to Aldous Huxley.

But, since then, the relationship between the two countries became strained, like two aging actors carping each about the other, especially after Singapore raced ahead in the economic stakes, leaving its elderly relative floundering under its own weight, and conflicts - a simple case of Money No Enough maybe.

Or maybe it was a heart breaking case of Farewell my Concubine, or, despite their similarities, the two countries could no longer be Happy together. It could be that the two country relationship between Malaysia and Singapore devolved into one of Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon, with neither country certain which was supposed to be which.

Similarly Chin Peng (born Ong Boon Hua) took up the lead role in the independence fight, like the brave, but somewhat incredulous, souls in Feng Xiaogang’s epic The Assembly (2007), to rid Malaya of the British.

But, after starring in the role of fighting Japanese invaders at the tail end of the Second World War, and, later, during The Malayan Emergency, Chin Peng continued his premier role under the banner of communism, and, like an old film star, was ousted from Malaya, effectively exiled in 1960.

It took another few decades before Chin Peng and the governments of Thailand and Malaysia were able to reach a peace accord. Chin Peng, tired of being relegated to the wings, wanted, just once, to sit in the audience. One of the terms of the 1989 agreement, seemed to be, the ability of the former Communist Party Malaya members to return home - that is, to Malaysia.

From Zheng He’s magnificent fleet’s first arriving in Malacca (1405 – 1407), to Tash Aw’s mapping of invisible worlds and silk factories there has been this undeniable link between China, people of Chinese heritage and Malaya/Malaysia.

Since the Chinese Civil War between the Kuomintang and the Chinese Communist Party, eventually won by the communists in October 1949, The People’s Republic of China has not relinquished its own particular brand of Socialism (communism). Though its form of communism has been greatly modified over the years, China is, nevertheless, according to the CIA website – a communist state.

Earlier in 2009 the Malaysian government signed an agreement with China to banish the need for visas between diplomats of the two countries. Malaysian diplomatic and official passport holders no longer need to have a visa to visit China and vice versa, this is part of a diplomatic understanding between the two countries.

During the past few years, thanks to visa restrictions being relaxed since 2000, thousands of students, from communist China, have entered Malaysia to study.

Perhaps there is a secret desire for them to teach Malaysians the delights of Kung Fu Mahjong, or the delicate art of the Kung Fu Hustle, and in return learn how Cikcak Man sends others up the wall.

As well as study, there have been tens of thousands of Chinese tourists wending their way to the land of Oil Palm and cendol, perhaps to sample Durian Durian and eat laska, or to fathom just how mee rebus is made - Scottish detective plus French puzzle and noodles. Or maybe they come to secretly make sequels to Eat Drink Man Woman (Yin Shi Nan Nu – 1994), called Eat La Drink La Mee Rebus La.

But whatever the real reason Chinese visitors have for coming to Malaysia, they are welcomed like Dust in the Wind, and maybe with a Touch of Zen, all, that is, except two.

There is a curious ambiguity in the fact that Malaysia now welcomes many thousands of Chinese, from communist China, including diplomats of the communist government, into Malaysia, but refuses to let one old, exiled, Chinese man come home.

In the year 2000 Chin Peng, then 76, applied to return to Malaysia, but, due to legal wrangling, this was delayed. Further hearings were scheduled for 2005, but failed. In 2008 Chin Peng again lost his chance to return to Malaysia, while in June this year (2009) Anwar Ibrahim has called for Malaysia to allow Chin Peng to return to the land of his birth, and for him to end his days here.

Lee Kuan Yew, who has been allowed to visit Malaysia, had been the whipping boy ever since Singapore and he split from Malaysia. For decades Singapore was the bad object, there to make Malaysia look good, but tides eventually turn, and Singapore became less reliant upon Malaysia as Malaysia did upon Singapore’s wealth. It became a clear case of the tail starting to wag the dog.

Then Lee Kuan Yew formerly retired as Singapore’s Prime Minister, in 1990, and eventually demoted himself to Minister Mentor status. With changes in high government politicians in Singapore and in Malaysia, the time was ripe for a little causeway mending, hence the new visit.

This visit, however, was not without suspicion, especially as Lee Kuan Yew’s first port of call was Penang, that bastion of the opposition and spiritual brother to Singapore – both being islands, predominantly Chinese and opposing UMNO.

Some have seen Lee Kuan Yew’s visit as a chance to kiss and make up, perhaps paving the way for Singapore’s incumbent Prime Minister, and Lee Kuan Yew’s eldest son, Lee Hsien Loong to arrive on a future state visit, maybe.

Perhaps if Chin Peng had some political Ang Pow to bring to the party, or was still the lead in a Chinese drama, he too might be allowed back home, but, as a he is reduced from being a leading man to a historical extra, there is little incentive for Malaysia to welcome him back.



PREVIOUSLY NOT PUBLISHED BY THE MALAYSIAN INSIDER

Do you Want to Touch Me? (Oh Yeah!)

Gary Glitter, the ageing rock singer who sang the above verse, was eventually extradited from Thailand, and, after other countries refused to give him sanctuary, was flown back to Britain and incarcerated for abuse against children, in 2008.

Initially Gary Glitter (born Paul Francis Gadd) had been arrested, in 1997, for child pornography found on his home computer and convicted in 1999. In 2005 he was arrested and charged with molesting under-age girls of 10 and 11, in Thailand, convicted in 2006.

Many young people looked up to Gary Glitter, as a rock star, as a mentor, as a role model and as someone they could trust and identify with. In return he was seen to prey upon those very impressionable innocents who trusted him.

It is an acknowledged duty, in society, for those who are adult, better off, knowledgeable, able and compos mentis to care for those who are not - not to abuse them or their trust.

Childhood per se was not seen to exist in the early centuries, when, what we might call children were seen as merely mini-adults. Childhood is seen as a Victorian construct, emerging out of a growing concern for family values in the late 1800s, and a concern for child labour, spearheaded by notables such as Charles Dickens.

Childhood is now enmeshed within the framework of many societies, and has grown to be protective of those people who society deems not yet mature enough for the responsibilities of adulthood.

Immaturity means that those people undergoing their childhood years are not fully able to make decisions, and need further time to grow until they reach the level society have declared that they may be able to do so. Attached to immaturity are notions of innocence, protection and trust.

In short, children, for that is what we call people during the childhood years, are vulnerable. Often vulnerable and trusting, for the two conditions frequently exist side by side. They are recurrently led to believe that adults will look out for them, care for them, help them grow and protect them, hence the trust that many children have in adults.

It is not difficult for adults to earn the trust of children. Children want to trust, want to be protected, guided, loved by adults and it has become part of the natural order of most societies for it to be so.

How much more heinous then, when an adult, having once gained children’s trust, abuses them.

Granted there are many forms of abuse, and depending upon which country you live in whether it is called abuse or chastisement, punishment or behaviour correction. But the form of abuse I refer to is not correctional nor chastisement, but the improper sexual advances by an adult towards children, popularly called paedophilia.

Paedophilia, as categorised by the American Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM) is a disorder whereby a person either has acted upon intense sexual urges towards children, or has recurrent sexual urges towards children and fantasises about children, enough to cause distress or interpersonal difficulty.

According to law a paedophile is an individual who has been found guilty of sexual offences (abuse) against a minor – a child. In common parlance a paedophile is a sexual abuser of children whether arrested or not.

As well as being a crime in law, the abuse of a child must be seen as not only a betrayal of trust, but a reprehensible violence against the very fabric of society. As well as injuring an innocent (child), the perpetrator of abuse also damages the adult that child grows into, if, that is, the child survives the abuse, or repercussions of the abuse.

Sadly many children are used, abused then discarded by their abusers, defiled, mutilated and cast aside in the hope that their crime is never discovered. Those are extreme cases. Much child abuse happens at a more subtle level, and is seldom reported due to stigmatisation and finger pointing.

In Malaysia UNICEF (United Nations International Children’s Emergency Fund) supported the Child Act 2001, which assisted in training and workshops for people working with children, later, in 2006, along with the Ministry of Women, Family and Community Development, UNICEF was able to form partnerships with child protection agencies and the police to battle child abuse and abusers.

This support has meant that necessary guidelines have been put in place to minimize the occurrences of child abuse by workers working alongside vulnerable children - minimize but not stop that form of abuse.

Abusers of children are often adept at concealing their nature/disorder, and act as predators. They are often calculative and stealthily stalk their victims, while hiding under a guise of normalcy. Like other forms of desire, the paedophile seeks to be closer to the objects of his, and it generally is his, desire.

Paedophiles may be uncles, grandfathers, neighbours or adult friends/mentors of children. Some Paedophiles edge their way into working with children, into government offices, playgrounds and into charities set up ostensibly to work with vulnerable innocents.

Some paedophiles have been discovered to be priests, teachers, care workers, youth group workers and even social workers. They are frequently found in professions and jobs which entail working with children of all ages, gaining their trust and ‘hooking’ them in to abuse them later. Paedophiles look for places where children are, including the internet.

As there is now a growing body of evidence of what paedophiles look for and how they seek out their prey, it is much easier to try to prevent harm to the children they seek. Government ‘Acts’ help to clamp down, but guidelines for working with children need to be much tighter.

Stringent police checks need to be made for anyone wishing to take up a job working with children, including voluntary/charity work too. Social agencies need to work alongside education and police departments to prevent people slipping through the net. More reporting of abuse needs to be encouraged, to prevent future abuse like in the Gary Glitter case.


PREVIOUSLY UNPUBLISHED BY THE MALAYSIAN INSIDER

Michael

Suddenly there is a Michael Jackson shaped hole in the universe.

The dire news crept, like a bad smooth criminal, into my slowly waking computer this morning. Facebook friends had posted, revealing and announcing for all, the possible death of the popular music veteran - Michael Jackson.

Can it be true. Doubt, surprise melding with shock swept adrenalin into me like some dangerous virus, racing through my veins making me feel edgy, discomforted. I considered, is it a hoax, can it really be true. Restlessly I Googled, read The Guardian on-line, and yes, it was true, there, displayed on my flat 19 inch Benq computer screen, the headline - ‘Michael Jackson has died’.

Of all performers Michael Jackson, like his music, presented the greatest enigma. At times hailed at other times vilified, he went from being the Afro-American boy next door to being one of the greatest pseudo-white singer/dancers of all time, from black to white, from Jehovah’s Witness to Muslim, from just another boy in a band to being the giant talent he undoubtedly was.

Stunned, trying to recover I momentarily recalled other times – when I was working nights in a hospital, and the news came over the car radio that Elvis Presley had died, or when reaching Art School, my contemporaries huddled round a small transistor radio amidst all the design paraphernalia, listening to the news that John Lennon had been shot dead. The realisation of Michael Jackson’s death was no less shocking, no less immediate.

Now, some hours later, it is still sinking in that the moon-walking, healer of worlds, stranger in Moscow Michael Jackson, who converted to Islam in 2008 and became Mikaeel (after the angel) has passed away to that great big gig in the sky this Thursday, the 25th of June 2009. Stories say that his heart, ever too large for one gentle man, gave out and reluctantly ushered in the uniquely unimpressive post-Michael Jackson era.

For music, like fine art, has its eras too, and while those who know may talk about post-impressionist or post-modern phases, so now musicians and musicologists must refer to the pre or post Michael Jackson eras. The king is dead long live the king – in our hearts and forever on YouTube.

And so, with the lack of beat in his all too human heart, that modern musically versatile Orpheus, Michael Jackson, goes to seek his Eurydice, only for Michael there will be no magic mirrors to climb back through, no return to the land of mortals leaving an entrapped Eurydice, but only the relative peace of eternal sojourn. The much abused poet may now leave his personal ghosts behind, and move on into whatever personal heaven awaited him.

Michael Jackson joins the throngs of moved-on melody makers, kings, queens, princes of contemporary composition to be with those already mentioned but also with two much applauded Beatles – John Lennon and George Harrison, one hallowed Pink Floyd – Syd Barrett and the great electric gypsy Jimi Hendrix. They now jam in splendid gigs with whiskey and gravel voiced Janis Joplin, sensually seductive Jim Morrison and all the other, now moved on, singers and musicians who gave so much of themselves, for us, mere plebs, to enjoy.

There may have been other kings of popular music, much lauded, be-wreathed and crowned by public and media, but this former member of Jackson Five represented his generation - the dance and disco generation.

For the pre and post war generation it was crooning, rat packing, suave Frank Sinatra, then in the 1950s the nervous leg twitching, pelvis thrusting Elvis Presley, but few attracted so much controversy, and emulation, as did Michael Jackson, for he represented the collective energy, the electric vibrancy of the age in which he lived, and for that generation he was The king of popular music.
Around the world Michael Jackson was admired not just for his music but also for his dancing, as attested by artists like the south Indian dancer Prabhu Deva, who frequently adopted Jackson’s style. Many children across the world, over the years, would try to master Jackson’s ‘moonwalk’ - it became de rigueur, a stock in trade for many dance competitions and wannabe dancers.

Throughout the vast negativity in his later years, Michael Jackson nevertheless strived to heal the ailing world in which he found himself. Amidst accusations and cruel finger pointing he was able to sponsor the Michael Jackson Burn Center in the Brotman Medical Center, Culver City, California in 1984, and ‘We Are the World’ which he co-wrote with Lionel Richie and performed to raise money for Africa in 1985.

In 2000 Michael Jackson broke the world record in Guinness Book of Records for most charities supported by a pop star, these included; - AIDS Project L.A; American Cancer Society; Angel Food; Big Brothers of Greater Los Angeles; BMI Foundation, Inc.; Brotherhood Crusade; Camp Ronald McDonald; Childhelp U.S.A.; Children's Institute International; Cities and Schools Scholarship Fund; Community Youth Sports & Arts Foundation; Congressional Black Caucus (CBC); Dakar Foundation; Dreamstreet Kids; Dreams Come True Charity; Elizabeth Taylor Aids Foundation; Juvenile Diabetes Foundation; Love Match; Make-A-Wish Foundation; Minority Aids Project; Motown Museum; NAACP; National Rainbow Coalition; Rotary Club of Australia; Society of Singers; Starlight Foundation; The Carter Center's Atlanta Project; The Sickle Cell Research Foundation; Transafrica; United Negro College Fund (UNCF); United Negro College Fund Ladder's of Hope; Volunteers of America; Watts Summer Festival; Wish Granting; YMCA - 28th Street/Crenshaw.

Michael Jackson became close to Islam on the conversion of his brother Jermaine in 1989, but did not convert himself until he was ready, last year. It was all part of the self healing process, which continued until his death yesterday, at the age of 50, in Los Angeles.

Mikaeel Jackson leaves a huge legacy of music, and touched the hearts of so many people over his years of performance. He leaves three children, other family members and millions of fans across the world mourning for him and themselves. He was unique and cannot be replaced.


PREVIOUSLY NOT PUBLISHED BY THE MALAYSIAN INSIDER

Its all a Matter of Communication

When I complained that my weekly articles were not appearing in The Malaysian Insider, as agreed. This is the response I recieved.


Dear Yusuf,

I have been regretfully assigned to advise you that it appears that
The Malaysian Insider is not the right fit for you. I am sorry you
feel that we have wasted your time when we do not publish your column
on Saturdays... as a news site, it is the call of the editors and
management as and when to use what articles they see fit for a certain
day.

Perhaps it is best that we part ways while everything is still
amicable. We would like to thank you for contributing and wish you all
the best in the future. All payments outstanding will be cleared as
soon as possible. We will be uploading your latest soon, as it is
about Merdeka.

Thank you and regards,

Sweet and Sour

Good Saturday, dear reader, we are now into our second week of the fasting month. I trust that you are having pure thoughts during daylight and sweet nothings whispered in your ears after dusk.

It has been a sweet and sour week, a week of punishment deferred, a week of rationing and some rationalising as health meets wealth and, as ever, the two dancing that inevitable duelling dance of titans.

Just a thought, to get the old grey brains cell whizzing - If justice deferred is justice denied, just what is punishment deferred – in that, we can but wonder at man’s logic.

While a certain former model now languishes as she waits for her punishment, on the East Coast of our glorious land, is it not time to take a step back and consider - what on earth is actually going on in this confused country.

Infamous philologist Friedrich Nietzsche, whom some (half) wit rhymed with peachy, suggested - “All in all, punishment hardens and renders people more insensible; it concentrates; it increases the feeling of estrangement; it strengthens the power of resistance.”

Is this really the intention of not only a senseless punishment but also a senselessly deferred punishment.

The sweetness of this model’s unexpected return to the bosom of her family, after being led away a hero, martyr for her cause, is marred, necessarily, by the deferment, rather than cancellation, of her obscene punishment.

No doubt, those making such decisions are wishing that the whole matter would now just go quietly away, especially as the eyes of the world seem to swivel towards this ludicrous case, and, quite possibly, the international reputation of this country resting on this matter too.

Elbert Hubbard, that grand American writer, on hearing of the above, might have pointedly remarked; punishment – The justice that the guilty deal out to those that are caught.

It has been a hog of a week. It has been the most swinish of weeks, a week in which there have been overt concerns with influenza of the porcine variety, of masks and masquerades of officialdom. A week, in which, potential two or three-ply paper mask wearers are saved the ignominy of exploitation by unscrupulous entrepreneurs, who sought to make a fast buck out of the fears of ordinary people, prone to wearing such items.

Mercifully, those protective masks now have a price fixed , with a ceiling imposed preventing further exploitation of the people’s paranoia.

It has been a week concerned over the most flagrant of conspiracy theories. In their narratives, these theories have mooted involvement with our good ole friends the American CIA, and the bioengineering of weapons-grade swine influenza, now popularly called H1 N1.

Some scientifically inclined individuals suggest that the present H1N1 might be human-engineered and similar to other pathogens - Ebola and HIV/AIDS in transmission vectors, which throw doubt upon the natural occurrence of these diseases.

Stories suggest, that certain laboratories are encouraged to churn out viruses with weapons potential to be used in future conflicts; as they have a much greater targeting specificity over more conventional weapons. Conventional weapons, with their great capacity to obliterate anything, awkwardly tend to mess up property as well as people. Awkward, that is, if you intend to occupy said property, or salvage items of worth, as many thoughtful, mindful soldiers have done - just for their safe keeping mind.

With this information firmly fixed in mind, perhaps people of a nervous disposition should refrain from watching Neil Marshall’s post apocalyptic British film –Doomsday (2008), at least until this current outbreak is over.

While some people may still view social networking sites, such as Facebook, Twitter and Myspace, as being sad refuges for pathetic lonely people, perhaps, at present, they are the safest way to interact with fellow travellers. Especially so if Malaysia undergoes the same intensity of H1 N1 outbreak as Mexico did, where only but essential services were allowed to operate because of the risk of spreading infection.

Nevertheless, fear not. If you do not have the swine flu virus, and seem unlikely to get it because you spend more time than is strictly necessary on those aforementioned social networking sites, you can always over indulge your taste for all things sweet - and get diabetes.

In this holy month of Ramadan many thoughts turn, obviously, to kuih, air bandung, teh tarik and a veritable cornucopia of wonderfully sweet, teeth rotting edibles and drinkables too; for during this sugary month more sugar is consumed in Malaysia than it is in the rest of the year. To aid in the manufacture of delectable, but deadly, items, copious amounts of refined sugar are required, with many households in the habit of purchasing in bulk.

This being so, the government, being patriarchal and nanny-like, have placed regulations on the movement of sugar between states, thereby restructuring the existing distribution network, confusing bees, ants and the odd official or three.

This measure, seemingly, is to prevent the annual hoarding of sugar. Mind you, without strict guidelines regarding what is hoarding of sugar, chaos ensues - I guess governmental minions will just make it up as they go along, as usual.

A further, yet allied, government initiative, from the Domestic Trade, Cooperative and Consumerism Ministry has been constructed, obviously, to discourage ideas of love thy neighbour and instead prosper concepts of tattling, spying upon your neighbour.

This is to reward spies, bringing news of hoarding sugar, with a grand prize up to RM10,000 for the sneaky fifth columnists. It is nice, is it not, to know that our blessed government has monies to spare to give to snitches, tell-tales, sneak thieves, instead of buying schoolchildren books.

It has been a healthily unhealthy week. Sweet nothings almost became nothing sweet to take at berbuka puasa in this health conscious week; a week when the only safe type of interaction may have been through the internet and social networking, unless you managed to purchase a paper mask with a capped price, that is.

Write On

(Or the cold hard truth about writing)

Many people have asked me what it is like to be a writer - what advice would I give to aspiring writers, well read on....

Writing is not a profession, it may, possibly, be a craft, seldom an art, but more often than not it is a vocation.

In Latin, vocation means a calling, aligned with notions and concepts of talent and having a ‘gift’ to do or perform certain tasks. To have a vocation for writing, effectively means that you have the will to write, and a desire to write to be read.

To become a writer takes a mammoth amount of discipline and hard practice. Like any other craft you have to constantly practice, this improves your skills and helps you master your chosen means of communicating with the external world.

Feedback from peers is one useful means of improving your skills, another is comparing your work with others in the field of writing you admire, or wish to get into. This applies equally to writing ‘literature’ as it does to ‘hack’ writing.

However, be warned, writing is seldom glamorous, except for the elite. It is frequently very hard work, with very little to show, finically, at the end.

If it is your desire, eventually, to write for newspaper or magazines, be warned that there is very little money in taking that particular course.

Newspapers either hire a writer onto the staff, or hire freelance writers. A staff writer is a dogsbody, paid a poor basic wage and gets very little credit for their work. The highest achievement a staff writer can attain is the ‘by-line’, that is having your name added to the work you have had published with your newspaper/magazine. To improve your lot you have to consider becoming a ‘sub’ (sub-editor) or indeed an editor.

Freelance writing for newspapers and magazines is poorly paid, and risky. Risky in the sense that, without a definitive contract which guarantees your work to be published the publication can decide, at a whim, whether to publish your hard work or not.

Even with a contract, the contractual wording can be such that the publication is favoured, not you. Some contracts will include a clause whereby they, your paymasters, can drop you from their ranks anytime they feel like.

Working for magazines and newspapers, on a freelance basis, often means not being paid for all the hard work – research, writing and editing, you have done. Therefore, despite being arduous, stressful, and frequently hard-pressed work, it is not a stable income.

In Malaysia, the fees for freelance articles vary from a mere RM100 up to RM1,000 an article, dependent upon the journal, the length of the article and the generosity of the publication you are writing for.

Newspapers in Malaysia pay between RM200 for 1,000 words, to RM250 for 600 words. Some newspapers pay per article, others by column centimetre/inch. Some magazines pay per word, some a set fee for an article and this can vary largely. One Malaysian magazine pays 50c per word, meaning a 2,000 word article pays RM1,000 while another will only pay RM250 for a set 600 word article.

Literary writing, in Malaysia, is even worse, financially. For short stories, the work is normally longer than for articles, anywhere between 3,000 to 6,000 words, with the research and writing taking days and weeks, rather than the hours spent for newspaper/magazine articles.

Placement for short stories is scarce in Malaysia, with very few publications, outside of anthologies, taking them. So competition is fierce, and publisher’s editors picky.

Financially, writing short stories, for publication in Malaysia, is a disaster. Some editors expect your work free, offering only one copy of the printed anthology in return for 3,000 – 6,000 words and many weeks, if not months, of work undertaken. Others can offer between RM100 – RM500 for a short story.

In Malaysia, it seems to be the case that payment is a one off, for a written story. Few, if any, publishers offer a percentage deal, or royalties on short stories. Once paid, the writer will get nothing extra even if the anthology their work is in is a best seller, or not. Therefore, there is little incentive for the writer to promote the book in which their work is featured.

The writer does all book signings, readings at popular events, radio /TV promotion and newspaper interviews - free, for nothing, with no other incentives offered by publishers, in Malaysia. Unfortunately, travel to such events as readings, and other promotional activities, comes out of the writer’s pocket too. A short story writer may be seriously out of pocket by having their work published.

If you feel, after reading the above, that you still want to be a writer then maybe, just maybe you have what it takes.

What does it take – a lot of hard work, dedication, perseverance, practice, the ability to take and use constructive criticism, and the energy not only to write but to engage in all that which associated with writing too.

A writer, who respects themselves, and their work, will not let it go lightly. However, it is frequently the case while working commercially, that you are at the mercy of unscrupulous publishers or editors - who habitually want something for nothing. This is something that all writers will have to consider, and deal with in their own way.